|||||Flaming Lips- "Do You Realize" (among others)||]|
Try and stick with me on this one...
You see.. Howie asked me for some movie advice the other day.. he needed an idea for a conversation that two characters in his script were to have.. the conversation had to do with love. Ha. Well..anyways... I ended up talking about soul mates the whole time..and basically this is what I had to say.. if you can actually follow my meandering and surpentining train of thought.. i give you some major kudos... but I was kind of just wondering what other people thought on the subject since my thoughts tend to be rather circular and not actually accomplish much in the decisive nature...
We've all asked ourselves..what is love? How do you know when you're IN love? Will I ever find love? Why do we love? But.. well...why? I mean we spend all of our time getting ready so we can look pretty, look manly, get fit, be impressive...we do all of these..things.. so we can attract the opposite sex..right? But..well...why? So we can..after all the mindless dating and searching.. eventually find that special someone to settle down and spend eternity with.? I mean.. why else would we date if not to play the feild long enough til we figure out what kind of partner we would like.
It's such a spectacular idea, but is there really such a thing? I mean is there actually ONE other person out there who completes us?..A person who is our "other half"?..or is it just something we have built such a trust upon..such a hope and faith upon.. that we make ourselves buy into the illusion. I can't figure it out.. hopefully one day you can though.
I mean..see.. here's the thing. The whole idea behind having a soulmate is to be and feel complete. To have this one other person who makes you whole..in essence, your other half. The ying to your yang..ect. But you are not the same person at 15 that you are at 25 and 35. Situations change, attitudes change, habits change, everything can change about a person as they age and experience different things. How can we expect one person to be our other half if our half keeps evolving?
That leads me to another thought.. maybe something our generation has realisically taken on... the idea that maybe.. well.. maybe different people are our "soulmates" at different times in our life.. These people are the ones that give us the complete feeling, but then move on as both personalities change. I mean, how can we expect a person to complete us through out our lives if we're different people..always changing..always learning and growing each and every year?
BUT.. then again..if there were such a thing as a soul mate.. in essence wouldn't they then complete us as we change because they're changing as well.. so you both are evolving as a whole together as well? And maybe by the time life ends you both have changed so much that you've actually merged and become the same..or the same in the sense that the love is so much stronger in your unity that no differences would split the two of you apart... instead of the opposing idea where you both have changed so much that youve become stangers who share a bed.
Perhaps the idea of a soulmate has nothing at all to do with "love" in the sense of passion and sex and marriage. Maybe soulmates are our friends, our family, the people we care most about. The friend you've had since kindergarten and can't go a day with out seeing. Your mom even, I mean that would only make sense since you are a living breathing part of her. Where did the idea come about that soulmates are only those which with you experience a passionate kind of love for?
And.. ok. Here's my biggest problem I guess. If you believe in soulmates you HAVE to believe in fate. You have to believe that there's a bigger plan for each and every one of us..and that our grand plans are already intermingled with those of others..and theres with others.. and so and so on. Because if you're my soul mate and i am yours.. then already our fates..our stories.. are to be written together. And who decides that? So are divorces inevitable? Are we already programmed to know who we will fall in love with, who will hurt us, who will love us, and who we will hurt? Is this some sort of subconscious chemical reaction? Something we call our "gut instinct" or our "chemistry". If its destined then lets just cut to the chase and have our fairytale romance..please?
Now I know this is off topic, but stick with me. Theres what...six or seven BILLION people on this planet. Yet, if we all have one soulmate.. what are the chances that we will meet them if not for fate? In order to have a soulmate who is destined to be with you.. I guess then really you have to stop looking and let fate take charge. Right?
So I guess that's just what I'll do.. I guess if I ever want to find the answers to my questions..all I really have to do is sit back and see what happens. Hopefully my thick head will some questioning and analyzing the world.. and it'll start listening to all the hidden whispers.. it'll start looking for the cosmic winks ;-)
psst.. i forgot to tell you guys.. i'm gonna try and add lyrics to each significant post..or maybe just every other day or so..
"Do you realize
That you have the most beautiful face?
Do you realize
We're floating in space?
Do you realize
That happiness makes you cry?
Do you realize
That everyone you know someday will die?
And instead of saying all of your good-byes
Let them know you realize that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round"